Talented Bangalore Student!!

21-year-old Gayathri, a computer science student who wants to join the IAS, drives an auto and does part-time modelling for a living. Knowing how to handle bigots and boorish men comes with the turf, someone Bangalore’s much-pestered women could take a leaf from…

Gayathri S, a Computer Science student who wants to join the IAS, drives an auto and does part-time modelling for a living

Gayathri S is petite, but behind the demure exterior is a strong-willed woman. This 21-year-old computer science student from Sri Revana Siddeshwara Institute of Technology, Chikkajala had to put aside her dreams of a career in the administrative service and drive an autorickshaw to support her family. Everyday, her work takes her through the lanes of Malleshwaram, Palace Gutthalli, Vyalikaval, and MG Road, and she has learnt to ignore unpleasant situations or, if it so warrants, to confront them.

Considering the fact that her work is male dominated, she is often singled out by her co-workers. “The younger auto drivers do make unflattering comments sometimes. I don’t have time to react to them and frankly I don’t care. The older men are kinder. They keep asking me why I had to do this, it’s not nice and all that,” said Gayathri. “See, I don’t park in the stands anyway. Since the auto is my family’s own, we park it next to my house. That way I get to keep my interaction with my fellow drivers minimal,” she added.

She, however, knows how to protect herself from lecherous men. “Most of the time I take female passengers and college girls. I try not to take men, especially younger ones, some of whom seem to assume I am fair game,” she said.

Gayathri with mother Rajeshwari

LOST CHILDHOOD

Gayathri’s father left the family when she was in class 10, but as an innately proud person she refuses to paint herself a victim. Her father used to be an auto driver himself and she first learnt to drive an auto from him when she was still under-age. “When I was in class nine and 10, just for fun I would drive the auto, and I am glad I did it so that now it helps me put food on the table,” said Gayathri.

This young woman started driving for a living only eleven months ago and the decision was propelled by the falling heath of her mother, Rajeshwari. “After my father left, my mother would somehow manage to make both ends meet by making incense sticks, but then her health started failing and she had to stop,” Gayathri said.

It was then that she decided to take things into her own capable hands. “We already had the auto and I knew how to drive it, so it was a natural choice. Initially, there were some hiccups. While attaining my licence the inspector told me that I cannot drive in my auto because he thought that I would have modified some parts to my benefit. He gave me another auto for the test drive and I cleared the test. That’s when I got my licence,” she added.

Besides driving, she manages to attend college three days a week.

HIGH ON HOPE

Gayathri has big dreams but her immediate plan is the education of her younger brother, Purushottam who is studying in class 10, and her sister, Usha who is in sixth standard. “I have to take care of their education, and after my education I want to pursue IAS,” said Gayathri. There are also debts to repay
.
“We have a Maruthi van that we bought on loan. In the morning I leave home by 6:15 and pick up school children from Malleshwaram, Kavalbyrasandra, R T Nagar and Hebbal and drop them off at St Joseph’s school,” said Gayathri. She also has a driver who brings the children back from school. But doesn’t she miss her own classes? “Yes I do. I am barely able to attend three days a week. But there is an accountant called Ramesh in my college who helps me a lot. He knows my problems and helps me with finances whenever I have to pay money for attendance shortage,” said Gayathri.

On an average, Gayathri gets to earn about Rs 15,000. “But out of that, Rs 2,500 goes for rent, Rs 2000 is given to the driver. My mother’s doctors bills and medicines cost about Rs 2, 500 to Rs 3,000 and my fuel costs about Rs 4000.

Whatever I do the money never seems to be enough,” she said.

This IAS aspirant also takes up a number of promotional jobs apart from part-time modelling. “In fact a Tamil TV serial director, Ramesh wants to make a serial on my life and wants me to act in it too. I only have to work during the weekends for the serial, which will appear in Vijaya TV,” said Gayathri. This young brave heart goes on to add that, “Sometimes I don’t get sleep at night. I keep thinking I do so much but still money is never enough. But then I console myself because I know problems are never permanent.”

Article from:

http://ngopost.org/story.php?title=Auto_Girl_On_way_to_IAS_by_driving_Auto

Learn the common causes behind your bodys little quirks

Whether uncomfortable, embarrassing or just plain weird, there are some pretty funky things that our bodies do. Curious about the causes of such reactions as hiccups, goose bumps and eye twitches, we spoke with Eric Plasker, DC, author of The 100 Year Lifestyle, to get the real scoop. Read on to discover the common reasons for 14 peculiar bodily functions.

Yawns

If your body is low on oxygen, your mouth opens wide and tries to suck more in. Yawning is a way to regulate the amount of carbon dioxide and oxygen in your blood. Unfortunately, yawns are nearly impossible to stifle.

Eye Twitches

Serious eye twitches can be a symptom of neurological disorders, but often there is a more mundane explanation. Common causes for eye twitches include stress, lack of sleep, extended staring or eye strain. Before you get frantic, try reducing your stress level, cutting back on caffeine and catching up on sleep.

Itches

According to Dr. Plasker, our skin most often gets itchy because of dryness associated with the environment or over-washing—water and soap can strip skin of its natural oils, thus sapping moisture. Face or body lotion should be able to keep these types of itches under control; also look for body washes and soaps labeled “moisturizing.†If you still have itchy patches, you may be experiencing an allergic reaction to a chemical, plant, food, animal or drug. See an allergist if the itching is persistent.

Hiccups

If you’ve frequently got a case of the hiccups, try slowing down when you eat and drink, suggests Dr. Plasker. Doing either too quickly causes your stomach to swell; this irritates your diaphragm, which contracts and causes hiccups. You may also get hiccups in emotional situations or if your body experiences a sudden temperature change. In both of these cases, the hiccups are a result of a glitch in your nerve pathways, which is why a sudden scare—which might shake up and reset your nerves—can sometimes end an episode.

Goose Bumps

Those tiny bumps that cover your skin when you’re cold or scared are actually a defense mechanism. Goose bumps occur when the arrector pili, a tiny muscle that connects the hair follicle with skin, contracts and makes the hair stand on end. If you had more hair—like cavemen did—the upright hair would trap air to keep you warm or make you look bushier and therefore more threatening to predators.

Sneezes

Sneezes happen when your body is trying to expel an irritant from the nasal cavity. If you have allergies, pollen or pet dander is usually to blame. If you have a cold, your body makes mucus to trap the virus, and sneezing helps force it (and the sickness) out of your body. An over-the-counter allergy or cold medicine helps suppress your reaction to allergens or reduce mucus production, which should prevent sneezing fits.

Coughs

A cough is another mechanism your body uses to get rid of irritants. There are special cells along your air passage, says Dr. Plasker, that recognize irritants and force them out. Common colds, sinus infections and pneumonia all increase your body’s mucus production, which triggers coughing. Smoking and asthma also tend to irritate the cells. To help cut down on chronic coughing, exercise regularly and practice good posture to keep your air passage open.

Charley Horses

These sudden, super-painful muscle spasms can be blamed on several things, including dehydration or electrolyte imbalances—often from strenuous exercise. After a demanding workout or an extra-long run, sip a sports drink to keep your system running smoothly. If you experience this type of cramping, walk around to help relieve the pain.

Shivers

Shivering, says Dr. Plasker, is full-body muscle twitching. When your temperature drops too low, your body shakes all over in an attempt to generate heat. The only way to cure these kind of shivers is to get your temperature back to 98.6°F.

Ear Ringing

Ear ringing, or tinnitus, can happen for two reasons. If you have fluid or an infection in your middle ear, you may hear a constant buzz. However, the more common cause is damage to the microscopic ends of your hearing nerves, which often happens when you’re exposed to loud noises. To prevent permanent damage (and preserve your hearing), wear earplugs at concerts and sporting events—or even when you mow the lawn.

Stomach Rumbles

As food, liquid and gas move through your digestive tract, your stomach muscles and intestines contract and cause rumbling noises—borborygmi is the scientific name. Everyone’s stomach makes noise during digestion, but if you have extra-loud rumbles, a teaspoon of olive oil or a cup of herbal tea with lemon may help ease them, says Dr. Plasker.

Limbs Falling Asleep

When there’s consistent pressure on part of a limb—like when you sit on your feet or rest your head on an arm—the pressure squeezes your nerve pathways and scrambles messages sent to your brain. The mixed messages make you lose feeling in the squished body part because your brain has trouble telling it what to do. To prevent a case of pins and needles, avoid sitting or lying in positions that compress your nerves.

Seeing Stars

If you stand too quickly, suffer a blow to the head or are stricken by a migraine, there’s a good chance you’ll see stars as blood surges to different parts of your body. Generally these tiny flashes of light will fade in a few seconds. If you see stars for more than a few moments, you could have a tear or tiny clot in your retina, and you should consult a physician immediately.

Ear Popping

The Eustachian tube in your inner ear is responsible for maintaining equal pressure on both sides of your eardrum. When you experience a rapid change in altitude—during takeoff in an airplane or when riding an elevator in an extra-tall building—the Eustachian tube opens to release pressure, and you hear a pop. To force the tube open (and “pop†your ears), squeeze your nostrils closed while exhaling forcefully through your nose.

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Chant:Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare,Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare.& be Happy

The Woman In Your Life...

~:This is a beautiful article:~

T he woman in your life...very well expressed...

Tomorrow you may get a working woman, but you should marry her with these facts as well.

Here is a girl, who is as much educated as you are; Who is earning almost as much as you do; One, who has dreams and aspirations just as you have because she is as human as you are; One, who has never entered the kitchen in her life just like you or your Sister haven't, as she was busy in studies and competing in a system that gives no special concession to girls for their culinary achievements One, who has lived and loved her parents & brothers & sisters, almost as much as you do for 20-25 years of her life; One, who has bravely agreed to leave behind all that, her home, people who love her, to adopt your home, your family, your ways and even your family ,name One, who is somehow expected to be a master-chef from day #1, while you sleep oblivious to her predicament in her new circumstances, environment and that kitchen One, who is expected to make the tea, first thing in the morning and cook food at the end of the day, even if she is as tired as you are, maybe more, and yet never ever expected to complain; to be a servant, a cook, a mother, a wife, even if she doesn't want to; and is learning just like you are as to what you want from her; and is clumsy and sloppy at times and knows that you won't like it if she is too demanding, or if she learns faster than you; One, who has her own set of friends, and that includes boys and even men at her workplace too, those, who she knows from school days and yet is willing to put all that on the back-burners to avoid your irrational jealousy, unnecessary competition and your inherent insecurities; Yes, she can drink and dance just as well as you can, but won't, simply Because you won't like it, even though you say otherwise One, who can be late from work once in a while when deadlines, just like yours, are to be met; One, who is doing her level best and wants to make this most important, relationship in her entire life a grand success, if you just help her some and trust her; One, who just wants one thing from you, as you are the only one she knows in your entire house - your unstinted support, your sensitivities and most importantly - your understanding, or love, if you may call it. But not many guys understand this......

Please appreciate "HER" I hope you will do....

Thnanks,

-Amaresh (jai)

An important lesson---nice one.

~*~*~:The Mayonnaise Jar:~*~*~

When things in your life seem, Almost too much to handle,
When 24 Hours in a day is not enough,
Remember the mayonnaise jar and 2 cups of coffee.

A professor stood before his philosophy class
And had some items in front of him.
When the class began, wordlessly,
He picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar
And proceeded to fill it with golf balls.

He then asked the students, If the jar was full.
They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured
them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly.
The pebbles rolled into the open Areas between the golf balls.

He then asked The students again
If the jar was full.. They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand
And poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else.
He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded
With an unanimous 'yes.'

The professor then produced Two cups of coffee from under the table
And poured the entire contents Into the jar, effectively
Filling the Empty space between the sand.
The students laughed.

'Now,' said the professor, As the laughter subsided,
'I want you to recognize that This jar represents your life.
The golf balls are the important things - God, family,
children, health, Friends, and Favorite passions
Things that if everything else was lost
And only they remained, Your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter Like your job, house, and car.

The sand is everything else --
The small stuff.

'If you put the sand into the jar first,' He continued,
'there is no room for The pebbles or the golf balls.
The same goes for life.

If you spend all your time And energy on the small stuff,
You will never have room for The things that are
Important to you.

So...

Pay attention to the things That are critical to your happiness.
Play With your children.
Take time to get medical checkups.
Take your partner out to dinner.

There will always be time
To clean the house and fix the disposal.

'Take care of the golf balls first --
The things that really matter.
Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.'

One of the students raised her hand
And inquired what the coffee represented.

The professor smiled.
'I'm glad you asked'.

It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem,
there's always room for A couple of cups of coffee with a friend.'

Please share this with other "Golf Balls"
I just did......

Hare Krishna Hare Krishna,

Krishna Krishna Hare Hare!!

What to do when you are trapped in a lift???

What to do when you are trapped in a lift??

We surely hope that this incidents never happen to everyone however We never know when and where accidents will happen to us OR people around us. Read on this example and hope this piece of information may help any of us when things do happen to ourself, our friends and our loved ones.
Oneday, while in a lift, it suddenly broke down and it was falling from level 13 at a fast speed. Fortunately, I remembered watching a TV program that taught you must quickly press all the buttons for all the levels.
Finally, the lift stopped at the 5th level.
When you are facing life and death situations, whatever decisions or actions you make decides your survival.
If you are caught in a lift breakdown, first thought in mind may be 'waiting to die'...
But after reading below, things will definitely be different the next time you are caught in a lift.
First - Quickly press all the different levels of buttons in the lift.
When the emergency electricity supply is being activated, it will stop the lift from falling further.
Second - Hold on tight to the handle (if there is any).
It is to support your position and prevent you from falling or getting hurt when you lost your balance.
Third - Lean your back and head against the wall forming a straight line.
Leaning against the wall is to use it as a support for your back/spine as protection.
Fourth - Bend your knees
Ligament is a flexible, connective tissue. Thus, the impact of fractured bones will be minimized during fall.
Do send out this piece of information to all!

How to Build Good Relationship ?

“If You Don’t Know
What Your Man Is Thinking,
Then He’s Probably
Thinking Of Leaving...”
You Already Know That When A Man “Closes Up” Or Stops Sharing, It’s A Bad Sign. Here’s How To Find Out EXACTLY What’s Going On Inside Of His Head… Then Use That Information To Not Only Re-Ignite His Love And PASSION For You… But Also Create A Deep, Intimate Connection Between The Two Of You That Lasts A Lifetime… Regardless Of What You’ve Been Through… And Even If He’s Already Considering Moving On…

Dear Friend Who Wants To Understand Men Better,

Have you ever wished you had a pair of X-Ray glasses that would let you look inside your man’s mind and let you know EXACTLY what he was thinking?

And if so… if you could get a hold of them and actually see inside of your guy’s head… do you think you’d be excited… or FRIGHTENED by what you might find?

If you answered, “Excited!”... Congratulations! I don’t need to tell you that feminine intuition is STRONG (much stronger than a man’s) and you are probably right.

On the other hand… if you don’t know what your guy is thinking… and if your feminine intuition is telling you that there might be something wrong… then chances are it’s probably WORSE than you think…

In other words… there is a very good chance he is thinking about LEAVING YOU…

And if he isn’t… he’s probably not far from considering it…

I’m sure that this isn’t news to you, and that you’ve already wondered this as well…

It’s almost like you can FEEL a barrier growing between the two of you… and that it’s only becoming BIGGER and harder to overcome as the days go on…

At the same time… I’m sure you also know that there is definitely hope… that it isn’t too late… and that if the two of you could just really connect with each other and talk about what you are both feeling, you could definitely work things out and become even closer together…

Something else you certainly know:

If you’ve hit one of these “barriers to intimacy” in your relationship, you’ve reached the point of “make it or break it”… and if you don’t do something to remedy the situation and rekindle the intimate communication you used to have with your man IMMEDIATELY… this could be it…

Fortunately… this barrier doesn’t have to be an obstacle at all.

In fact… it’s perfectly normal for couples to experience difficult times.

The key, of course… is HOW YOU HANDLE THEM.

And handling these things correctly comes down to one thing:

COMMUNICATION.

When you and your man are able to share open, honest communication with each other… a “rough spot” can actually bring the two of you closer together… and create a rock-solid foundation of love and intimacy that propels you to new levels of connection in your relationship… as you work together to make things great.

But go about things the wrong way… and it could be the beginning of the end…

Here’s How You Might Be Making Things Worse...

Unfortunately… having open, honest communication with your man isn’t always easy… and most of the time, HE certainly isn’t going to help. I’m going to guess that when you try to communicate with your man, you’re running into one or both of these things: 1. He Just Doesn’t Listen Do you ever feel like what you say to your man goes in one ear and out the other? You know… that look that he gets on his face… where he’s doing his best to ACT like he’s listening… because he doesn’t want you to get upset? Maybe you’ve asked him nicely to take out the trash every Tuesday for the past 10 weeks… yet every Wednesday morning you wake up to find it hasn’t happened… Of course… the fact that the trash isn’t out is no big deal. What IS a big deal is that he just isn’t listening to you… or just doesn’t seem to care… And then… the same thing happens when you try to talk to him about something deep and meaningful… like where your relationship is going or something that’s upsetting you… only to find he seems to care more about who won the ballgame or what’s for dinner… This can be INSANELY frustrating… and the worst thing is he doesn’t even seem to care that it makes you feel this way. Not fun. And on top of all that… 2. He Doesn’t Talk Have you ever known your man was upset about something and asked him what was wrong… and he simply replied with, “Nothing” and walked away? You KNEW something was going on… but instead of wanting to talk about it and share his feelings… he simply shut down… and left you to try and “guess” what was bothering him and how to fix it. This kind of behavior, when a person says “nothing” and walks away, is called “passive aggressive”. It’s hard enough to fix the actual problem… but now you’ve also got a passive aggressive problem to deal with on TOP of the actual problem! Unfortunately, the things most women do to try to “fix” these frustrating situations, gets them nowhere… The first mistake women often make is to share LESS of their feelings with their man. Of course this is usually done out of sheer frustration… if attempts to share your feelings with your man get you nowhere… and can even take you BACKWARDS… why bother, right? But… I think you KNOW that this isn’t the answer. In fact, I think that YOU know that if the two of you could just sit down and have some open communication with each other, you would BOTH feel better… and it would bring you closer together… Which is exactly why you want to share your feelings with him in the first place! Well guess what? You are absolutely RIGHT. So with that in mind… is the solution to communicate MORE? I don’t think so. And if you think back on your past experiences I think you know that attempting to communicate more isn’t the answer… If you’re not communicating with him in a way that is WORKING… you know as well as I do that things are NOT going to get better. You can’t blame someone for being optimistic… but if you’re driving and you run into a brick wall, should you keep running into it? Unfortunately many women make the mistake of thinking that more attempts to communicate with their man will eventually get him to “crack”… or that maybe he will “change”… and that somehow everything will turn out alright. But let me ask you this… have you ever been in one of these situations and KNOWN deep down in your heart that if you could just get your man to communicate with you and the two of you could openly share your feelings with each other… that the two of you WOULD have worked out… and would have had a great chance at experiencing the dream relationship you both have always wanted? But then… after months or even years of getting nowhere… eventually you just gave up… and moved on? Unfortunately I know a lot of women that have experienced this painful situation MANY times… In fact… for some women this paints a picture of their entire relationship history… They meet a great guy… have an amazing “honeymoon stage” filled with passion, romance, and tons of fun… but then things start to get difficult… communication breaks down and he begins to “shut off”… and things are NEVER the same again… It’s sad. And it sucks. But here’s the good news: IT DOESN’T HAVE TO BE THIS WAY. Really. You CAN get your man to listen to you. You CAN get him to share HIS thoughts and feelings with you. And you CAN get him to take an ACTIVE INTEREST in knowing how YOU are feeling and wanting to bring the two of you closer together… and make the magical thing you share last and last and last…

Your Man WANTS To Communicate With You…
But He Needs YOUR Help

I’ll be the first to admit that we men aren’t always easy to deal with. Ok… fine… we’re almost never easy to deal with. There, I said it… But just because it may SEEM as though your man doesn’t want to communicate with you on a deep, emotional level… does that really mean he doesn’t want too? Does he really NOT care about your feelings and your relationship? The answer is NO. In fact… that isn’t the case AT ALL. Here’s something that may surprise you: 9 times out of 10… when a man is involved in a serious relationship with a woman… he WANTS to communicate just as much… if not MORE… than the woman he is with! I’m not kidding. Huh? I know this seems hard to believe… but stay with me here… I want you to put yourself in your man’s shoes for a minute… Imagine for a moment that you were raised with the belief that it is NOT NORMAL for you to want share your feelings with another person… and that if you were to do so, you would come across as WEAK and INSECURE. Imagine that instead of sharing your feelings with someone you care about… you were taught that you were supposed to keep them bottled up inside of you and deal with them… like a man? How would this affect your communications with others later on in life? Well guess what? Nearly EVERY man is taught from a very early age that it is NOT ok for him to open up to another person… It’s just not the “manly” thing to do. These beliefs are POUNDED into his head day in and day out… As a result of this upbringing, we men are very cautious when it comes to deep, meaningful communication… sharing our feelings… learning about yours… and just the WHOLE IDEA of “feelings” in general… In fact… just say the word, “feelings” around a man, and most guys will get a little freaked out… Nod your head if you know what I mean… Because we men have been taught from a young age that we should deal with our feelings INTERNALLY… we are naturally very resistant to “deeper” communication with ANYONE… including those we care about the most. It’s not healthy… but it’s all we know. So naturally… when a woman wants to talk “feelings” with us… we get a little scared and nervous… because it’s not only something we have NEVER done before… it’s also something that we are taught will make us appear WEAK, INSECURE, and less of a man. And of course… this is the LAST way we want our woman to see us. Now… you know this isn’t the truth. You know that sharing feelings with your man will, in fact, bring you closer together… But unfortunately… years of programming have told us otherwise… and MASSIVE barriers have been built up in our minds. This creates a HUGE dilemma for US as well… We WANT to open up to you… but at the same time, we just don’t feel COMFORTABLE doing so… So instead… we take the “easy” way out… and just avoid it all together. Fortunately, this “bad programming” of ours can actually be GOOD NEWS for you…

How The Way You Communicate With Him Determines Whether Or Not YOU Are “The One” For Him…

You know just how hard is it to get a man to open up to you… and here’s something else you need to know: YOU ARE NOT ALONE. In fact… most men have so many barriers to open communication built up in their heads, there is a very good chance that YOUR man has never opened up to a woman before. Seriously. These barriers can be difficult to “crack”… especially for women who don’t know how… Because of this, many men will go their entire lives without ever feeling like they have met someone who really understands them. Remember: We men WANT to share our feelings, and have someone we can open up to... And when we meet a woman who doesn’t know how to make us feel COMFORTABLE doing so… we get just as frustrated as you do… we just show it in a different way… That said… it’s VITALLY important that you understand this one simple thing: A man wants to communicate with you… but he needs your help! If YOU can be the one woman a guy has been involved with who actually CAN connect with him on a deep, intimate level… it can be a VERY powerful and unique experience for a man… I’m talking about something he has NEVER experienced before. And when YOU are the one woman with whom he can have this amazing experience… a very powerful thing begins to happen inside of him… Your man will see you not only as his lover and partner… but as his soul mate... the one woman on earth who has helped him release all of those feelings and frustrations he’s “bottled up” inside of him over all of those years… and the one woman he can TRULY connect with. And fortunately… making a man feel comfortable and open to sharing his feelings with you can actually be EASY… when you know the right way to overcome the barriers to communication that are built up in his mind…

How Good Relationships Go Bad… And What To Do About It…

You know that men and women CAN successfully communicate with each other. After all, communicating is how you got to be seriously involved with your man in the first place. I’m also sure you remember how fun and exciting it was when the two of you first met… how you were absolutely crazy about each other… and how communicating with each other was natural and easy… But… as two people get to know each other better and become closer to one another, things change… When you first meet a man, you are less likely to be judgmental of him… and less likely to get your feelings hurt by something he says or does. As a result, he’s more likely to be honest with you… and a lot more open to communication… because he’s not as worried that you will react negatively to him. But as you grow closer together, things change… It’s only natural for you to become more judgmental of his actions and words, and for him to become more judgmental of yours. This can create more barriers to solid, clear communication… as I’m sure you already know. Those little “annoyances” that people naturally begin to have about people they spend a lot of time with begin to start appearing… and experiences from past communications begin to mold future interactions… This can lead to more dishonesty with each other… which often starts out as a “white lie”… and spirals into an all-out fight! For example… let’s say there was a time when you asked your man what he did the other night when you weren’t together… and he openly told you that he went out with his friends to a bar… Upon hearing this, it’s very common for a woman to give him a little bit of “crap” for not taking her along… or maybe feel a little jealous and hint---or even flat out accuse him---of going out to meet other girls. Think about how these behaviors can subconsciously “train” a man to act the next time he’s in a similar situation… The next time he goes out with the boys and you ask him about it later, even if he kept his eyes on the football game the entire time, it could make MORE sense to him to tell you what he feels is a “white lie”---maybe that he “stayed home”---simply because he doesn’t want you to get worked up! But then the next day you find the receipt from his bar tab on the counter… and all hell breaks loose… Now… I’m not saying that you have personally done this particular thing to make your man resistant to communicating with you… this is just an example. My point is, as if his upbringing wasn’t enough… there are ALL KINDS of other things that make a man resistant to communication… Some of them occur naturally in a relationship… and some of them you may be bringing about yourself. Your man may also have other EXTERNAL barriers to communication that you aren’t aware of… such as stress in other areas of his life… insecurities he has with HIMSELF… or even “baggage” from past relationships… Either way… in order to effectively communicate with your man, it’s important that you learn what his PARTICULAR barriers to open communication are… and how to help HIM overcome them in a way that makes him excited about doing it… When you do this correctly, your man will not only LISTEN to what you have to say… but also open up to you… and even begin to take an active interest in your feelings… every single day. So what are the RIGHT ways to achieve this? Well… unless you’ve been living in a cave, I’m sure you’ve heard what some of the so-called relationship “experts” have to say about this… But the fact of the matter is… They are dead wrong! I’d like to share with you 3 all-too-common communication “myths”… techniques that are SUPPOSED to bring you and your man closer together by getting him to open up to you… but in reality… are almost GUARANTEED to push him farther away… Let’s get right into it… Myth #1: Telling A Man Exactly How You Feel Is What’s Most Important Is it important to share your feelings in your relationship? Absolutely. Doing so is what gives your relationship intimacy and depth and makes it real. But do most of us do a good job saying how we feel when we’re upset, hurt, or frustrated by something and we really need someone else to hear us and lend us some understanding? Absolutely not. Instead, we end up communicating in a way that not only keeps us from getting the response or outcome we want (having the other person understand us)… but it actually ends up making things WORSE. Now, I get that it’s frustrating to think or feel like you can’t just “be yourself” with a man and share all your feelings with him. I know that if you don’t have the freedom to experience and express your feelings, or if a man won’t listen to you and try to understand you at all… then your relationship is going to feel like it’s a dead-end. That’s why lots of women end up feeling like they have to “stuff” some of their emotions down inside themselves if they want to keep their relationship going with a man. But the reality is that it doesn’t have to be this way, and you CAN share your feelings with a man and not have it back-fire on you… but only if you learn THE RIGHT WAY to do it. One of the reasons so many women have problems when they share their feelings isn’t just because men don’t “get it”. It’s because most of the “conventional wisdom” out there tells you that when you have a feeling (especially a negative one), you’re supposed to try and be clear about your feelings and say “I feel angry...” or “I feel sad…” or “I feel hurt”. Some call this using “I statements”. This is a communication technique where you simply state the feelings you are having to start the conversation. Well, have you ever tried this with a man? If so, did it get you THE RESULTS you wanted? Exactly. Not even close. You probably got either that blank, withdrawn, passive-aggressive response where he did nothing to acknowledge or respect your feelings… or you got that instantly angry or irritated “rejecting” response where he tried to turn your feelings back on you and blame you or criticize you for having them in the first place. As though you were being “too emotional” and making life unnecessarily difficult. If you start using “I statements” and you weren’t using them before… you’re actually going to get a BETTER response from the man in your life… at first. But you’re going to quickly end up right back where you started if you don’t know WHY “I statements” work… and the other critical pieces to good communication that have to go along with them… or else. Try thinking of it this way… If you wanted to lose some weight and firm up your waist, you might start doing sit-ups. And after sticking with your sit-up workout for weeks or months, you would expect some inches to drop from your waistline. But what if you also had the habit of having several pieces of chocolate cake every day… and after doing your sit-ups, you ate some cake? Would you still lose the weight? Obviously not. Sit-ups are only ONE PART of what can help you lose weight… but they won’t get the job done on their own. In other words, if you ignore all the other important components to weight loss… then even though you’re disciplined with your sit-up workout, you aren’t going to get the results you want. Well… it’s the same with using “I statements”. They are a great technique or tool in communicating with a man, and you may even see some immediate short-term results. But if you are still repeating your other bad habits (chocolate cake), you won’t really solve the problem and you’ll put the pounds right back on. That’s why… by using “I statements”, you’ve only interrupted your OLD PATTERN OF COMMUNICATION. And when you just change your old pattern, you haven’t actually CHANGED what’s been going on and being shared AT A DEEPER LEVEL. You’ve only created a new pattern that rests on the same EMOTIONAL PATTERNS, and is therefore sure to find it’s way back to the same kind of rejecting or ignoring emotional responses you were getting in the past. Myth #2: A Man Will Fix Your Negative Communication “Patterns” When He Finally “Opens Up” In case you haven’t realized it yet, most couples have several very distinct patterns they play out over and over in their relationship. It might be a certain argument that keeps being “re-hashed”. It might be a recurring source of conflict. Or it might be some bad experience from the past that keeps coming up. But part of the pattern always includes some way of coming back together in the end… until the next go round. You’ll know exactly what I’m talking about if you picture in your mind a couple you know who fights a lot… and you look at what’s actually going on besides the WORDS that they’re saying. Sure, the words might be what appear ON THE SURFACE; but the argument and the source of pain, anger, or resentment isn’t really about the words if you stop to think about it. The reality is that all these different arguments and all these conflicts have something in common – the same basic EMOTIONAL PATTERN keeps going on UNDERNEATH THE SURFACE. By the way, proof that these emotional patterns can be seen when your relationship has been going great for a while... a man has been acting and responding to you differently… and then the “old” guy comes out again and acts the way he used to. It’s at these times that you feel like for all the work that’s gone into your relationship, it hasn’t really grown one bit. And now you’re back at square one with him acting the way he used to when things were bad, when you thought things were different now. But the truth is that there was an old NEGATIVE EMOTIONAL PATTERN between the both of you. Unfortunately, the mistake most women make is to believe this pattern only exists because of the man in their life doing something wrong, and them having to respond. When in reality the NEGATIVE EMOTIONAL PATTERN going on in their relationship is, by definition, something that plays on the fears and frustrations of BOTH SIDES. There’s an old wise saying I always come back to: “It takes two.” A pattern exists between two people because BOTH PEOPLE play a part in perpetuating the cycle or the pattern they are experiencing. It basically works like this - when one person acts one way to start a pattern, the other person has a common and predictable response that is exactly what pushes the pattern further along. That’s how patterns work and why they are patterns – they reinforce themselves. That is why whatever each person in the pattern does, whether they believe they are right or wrong, they are actually ADDING ENERGY to the negative and destructive nature of the pattern and reinforcing its strength and power over them. Following me here? The point of this is… if you want to break a pattern in your relationship with a man, the only quick and fool-proof way to do so is to make sure YOU stop reinforcing the pattern and adding energy to it. A common example of a negative pattern you can probably relate to is when a woman is frustrated that a man won’t open up. (being “closed” is a common male behavior that starts negative patterns in relationships) When this happens, lots of women get frustrated and try to get the man to open up and listen and share… and without realizing it, they do it in a way that makes a man feel criticized for not being a good partner and knowing how to make her happy. (This is their emotional response or “feedback” that reinforces more of the negative emotional pattern within the man) And so the man either gets angry or shuts down more. And then the woman has her own negative reaction to this. And so continues the pattern… back and forth, from one to the other, triggering destructive behavior and responses on both sides. Myth #3: “Listening” Means A Man Is Going To Be Happy With What You Have To Say I doubt you realize it right now, but you have an amazing amount of POWER when it comes to affecting a man with your thoughts, words, and feelings. An unbelievable amount of power and influence, actually. You just don’t realize it from where you are. Here’s a fascinating way to think about it… Most men out there spend a large portion of their daily lives trying to be strong, focused, and unaffected by the problems and distractions of the world so that they can “be men” and strive for what they think of as “success”. They engage in challenges, fights, negotiations, etc… all things that encourage men to make themselves less “vulnerable” to pain and emotional distress. In a sense, men spend a lot of energy learning to “turn off” their sensitivity and get things done... and act as though it’s a ‘rite of passage’ and a ‘must’ for a man to be this way. And in spite of all that, guess what? A woman can come along and instantly “undo” all that work a man has put into building up his strength and “invulnerability” with just a few words out of her mouth… AND she can do so in a way that no amount of fighting, struggle, pain, etc. with anyone else but the woman he’s close to could ever bring about. If that’s not power, I don’t know what is. Most women don’t realize and accept the power that their thoughts, feelings, and words have on the man in their life. In fact, they become fooled and blinded into thinking that they have NO POWER AT ALL because when they share their feelings with a man, he doesn’t respond in the way they expect or want him to. This is kind of like thinking you can’t sing because you break all the glass in the room each time you let a note ring out. The fact is that you are TREMENDOUSLY POWERFUL when it comes to influencing a man with your thoughts, emotions, and words. You just need to learn to harness your power and use it to create the response you want. Or to use our metaphor… if you’re singing along with a group of singers, it doesn’t matter how great you can hit the notes you want if you aren’t singing in the right key - you’re going to sound “off” and make the entire group sound awful as a result. When you share your feelings with a man, he isn’t always supposed to accept everything you have to say, understand it all on the spot, and feel happy about it. This isn’t how MATURE COUPLES communicate. Often times, just like any human being, he will be “singing in his own key”, to use our metaphor again. Unfortunately, women who are less mature or easily distracted or upset emotionally when they don’t get the response they want end up losing their cool and doing and saying things that are destructive to their relationship… When all the while when things didn’t look “perfect” on the surface, everything was working just fine. They just didn’t know what a real mature conversation looked like. And what it meant when a man was, in fact, being mature and “healthy” in the way he was communicating and responding. There is a better way. A way that moves beyond the “tit-for-tat” dynamic at the heart of relationships that go from withdrawn, to argumentative, to making-up but not getting past what’s going on BENEATH THE SURFACE.

How To Create The Kind Of Open, Understanding Relationship Most Couples Never Get To Experience… Quickly And Easily…

If you’re serious about creating the type of open, connected, loving relationship with your man that most women… and men… never get to experience… then I have some FANTASTIC news for you… I’ve just put the finishing touches on a brand new program that is designed to teach any woman how to communicate with her man in a way that not only gets him to listen to you and TAKE INTEREST in what you have to say… but also open up and share his own feelings in a way he has never done with any woman before… I’ve decided to call this program, “Communication Secrets For A Secure Relationship”. In it, I’ll show you the hidden secrets to connecting on a deeper emotional level in your relationship… and bringing about more love, intimacy and mutual understanding. I can’t tell you how many times I have actually watched women communicating with men in their lives, and seen them miss the big opportunities that were right in front of them to not only get more of what THEY WANT from a man in their relationships… but also to help their man get what HE wanted out of the relationship as well. In other words, the inability to recognize the subtle but critical opportunities to connect even in everyday conversation, but also in the critical relationship “talks” and points of change kept BOTH the woman AND the man from getting what either of them wanted. I’ve seen, watched, and been on BOTH SIDES of communication in relationships… I’ve been “that guy” on the other side that DIDN’T GET IT… and I now have the perspective growing out of that and looking back at what went wrong and what I didn’t see – and the mistakes women made with me because they didn’t know how to help me deal with what ‘I’ was going through… Since then, I’ve helped women, coached them, and worked with literally hundreds of other experts who have spent years observing communication in relationships… and I’ve boiled down all of what I and these experts have seen to the essential elements that will help you become closer and more connected to YOUR man right away… We like to think arguments, disagreements, etc. have a winner and a loser---or a listener and a talker---but the truth is that often times in intimate relationships BOTH PEOPLE feel like they are “losing”… and misunderstood and unheard. Of course the good news is that it DOESN’T HAVE TO BE THIS WAY FOR YOU… and my new “Communication Secrets” program will show you how… In it, you’ll learn a complete system for identifying exactly what a man means when he says something… and what it means when he doesn’t say anything at all. You’ll discover clear ways to communicate and share your thoughts and emotions in a way that guarantees a man will listen, respect your feelings, and respond in a positive way. You’ll also learn about ways of communicating that go BEYOND WORDS. Words can never tell you everything you need to know about a man… especially if he doesn’t talk or share with you much. It’s actually learning to understand what’s going on “beneath the surface” that makes the difference… and in this program you’re going to learn how to see inside a man’s mind and figure out exactly what he’s REALLY thinking and feeling. And that’s just the start. Here are a few more of the powerful secrets you’ll learn:

• How to tap into the “hidden messages” your man is SUBCONCIOUSLY sending you… and know exactly what he is thinking and feeling at all times
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• The REAL reasons why men pull away when you try to talk to them about something meaningful (Here’s how to find out if it’s because of things that are going on with him… or if it’s YOU that is causing him to be resistant)
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• 2 dangerous mistakes women make that make even the most understanding men CLOSE UP… often permanently (If the communication in your relationship used to be great but is now non-existent, chances are it’s because you did one of these 2 things)
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• How to use your BODY LANGUAGE to make a man feel comfortable and relaxed around you (This is one of the big KEYS to getting him to open up and share his feelings)
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• How to keep your conversations from turning into ARGUMENTS (I don’t need to tell you how important this one is. Here’s how to see his side from a position of understanding instead of anger… and get him to do the same)
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• The times when you must ALWAYS let a man “take charge” (Miss any of these and he’ll see you as “controlling” and ANNOYING)
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• How to react when your man does something WRONG (Most women mess this one up and make things worse… and even cause their man to resent them. Here’s exactly how to handle it in a way that makes sure he never makes the same mistake twice)
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• How to identify what you really want out of your relationship and how to let your man know in a way that gets him EXCITED about working with you to achieve what’s best for both of you
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• How to phrase your questions in a way that gets your man to actually give you an honest answer instead of avoiding them
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• EMOTIONAL FREQUENCY – How to tune in to what your man is thinking and feeling and use this information to communicate with him at a deeper level than anyone ever has before
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• Why a man needs his “alone time” (It’s important that you know when to “let him be” and the times when he is open to conversation)
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• Logical vs. Emotional Communication – How to appeal to a man’s LOGICAL side in order to get what you want emotionally
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• The one LAW of communicating with a man you must never break (Almost ALL women make this mistake at one point or another… and often it’s the ONE THING that keeps them from ever really connecting with their man at a deep level)
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• 4 word-for-word lines to say to your man to get the conversation about your relationship started in a way that makes him OPEN to what you have to say instead of “shutting down”
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• The 5 deadly communication MISTAKES most women make… and what to do instead (If your relationship is new or still in the “honeymoon stage” you can afford to make 1 or 2 of these mistakes… but if it’s even close to “on the rocks” just one could end it much faster than you think)
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• How to create security in your relationship that goes FAR BEYOND simply having the title of “boyfriend”, “husband”, etc. (Here’s how to create a deep, intimate, heartfelt connection that both of you can FEEL and take comfort in)
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• How to figure out EXACTLY what to say and ask your man in order to bring you closer together (It’s different for everyone so it’s important that you learn what needs to be said to create honesty and understanding in YOUR relationship. Here’s how…)
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• The 5 things you would THINK would bring you closer to your man that actually push you farther apart (Chances are you are doing many of these things now… and you need to STOP IMMEDIATELY)
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• 5 simple things you can do every day to create a deeper connection with your man that require no “work” (Men LOVE when you do these things… and they often make the difference in whether a relationship lasts for years or just weeks or months)
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• How to build your man up into the great partner and lover you KNOW he could be (Here’s how to help your man tap into his hidden potential and be the BEST mate possible, step-by-step)
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• What to do if you feel like you are doing all the “work” in your relationship and he is doing nothing (This common problem is surprisingly EASY to fix… but unfortunately most women never learn how…)
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• What to do if your man has become “disengaged” and doesn’t do the nice things he did for you when you first started dating (Here’s how to get things back on track and re-ignite his EXCITEMENT for treating you like a queen)
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• How to move beyond simply “fixing” your relationship… and instead create a SECURE FOUNDATION that holds the two of you together during good times and bad
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• Why men take longer to process what you say than women do (Here’s how to tell if he is actually listening to you and just taking time to process or if he’s merely “faking it”)
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• How to respond when your man gets mad about you not calling him… or other “little things” that actually have a BIG effect on how he feels about you and whether or not he trusts you
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• A simple 7-step exercise that will show you EXACTLY where you are making communication errors with your man… and how to fix them quickly
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• How to speak to your man in a way that gets him to understand precisely what you mean instead of “guessing” (Most women are far too vague when communicating with their men and guys almost NEVER know what you mean. Here’s how to communicate with him in way that forces him to “get” what you are saying and also RESPECT YOU for saying exactly what you mean)
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• DOZENS of word-for-word examples to show you how these breakthrough techniques and strategies should be used in the real world
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• 4 ways women COMPLAIN to men that only make the problem worse… and can even make a man resent them (It SEEMS like saying these things to a man would get him to change his ways… but in actuality they do the opposite)
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• How to identify and eliminate any negative communication patterns you have in your relationship and replace them with GOOD HABITS that bring you closer together
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• A powerful 5-minute exercise that shows you how to control your emotions during your talks with your man… so you NEVER make the mistake of saying something you might regret
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• How YOU could be causing your man to treat you poorly (Here’s how to turn things around and get him to not only RESPECT you as a person but treat you like a queen)
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• A big mistake women make that causes a man to feel he must be DISHONEST with her… even about the “little things”!
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• A fun exercise to do TOGETHER with your man that helps you get to know each other on a very deep level… and find out exactly what makes each other “tick” (The best part about this one is it’s FUN and you and your man will have a blast doing it!)
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The World’s Best Communicators Reveal Their Secrets…

To ensure that no stone was left unturned, I invited some of the world’s foremost experts in the area of personal communication to join me in this program… and share their unique strategies for increasing the communication and PASSION inside of your relationship… From an expert in astrology and personality types to a famous doctor who specializes in human sexuality… you’re going to hear IT ALL… I can’t tell you what a pleasure it was for me to have these guests join me on stage… the information they shared is going to BLOW YOUR MIND… and you’ll use it to blow your man’s mind as well… Here’s a small preview of what you’ll learn from my amazing guests:

• How to criticize a guy’s actions or behavior in a way that makes him not only listen to you and RESPECT what you have to say… but take action to change his behavior for the better (If there is something your guy does that drives you nuts, use this technique to let him know about it and what to do instead in a way that earns his respect instead of turning on you)
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• The Planetary Personality Types – A unique and accurate way to “size up” your man in MINUTES and figure out the exact way to communicate with him that gets him to respond the most
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• The 3 characteristics all men MUST HAVE in a woman they will open up to
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• REVEALED: The 3 most common male fantasies! (My guest has gone through THOUSANDS of studies and discovered that these 3 fantasies are shared by nearly all men. Here’s how you can use them to spice up your relationship and rock his world the very same night you learn them)
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• How treating a man like a “dog” can actually get you what you want (It sounds funny, but it’s true. Here’s how…)
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• How to use secret body language “tweaks” to change a man’s perception of you and make him feel more comfortable around you
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• My guest’s simple step-by-step method to give your guy---and yourself---the best night of sex either of you has ever experienced! (You won’t find this routine in any book or magazine anywhere… and I GUARANTEE your man has never experienced anything like this before…)
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• How to tell your partner what you like in the bedroom without hurting his ego (Do just this one thing and he will be even more eager to please you… and often)
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• Exactly what to do when a guy you care about STANDS YOU UP (Deal with this in the wrong way and he’ll start to see you as “needy”… but do this instead and you’ll NEVER have to worry about him standing you up again)
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• The Shy Girl’s Guide To Erotic Talk In The Bedroom – He’s how to drive your man wild using only your words and have him BEGGING for more…
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• The 4 powerful things you can do to spice up your “making love” life TONIGHT that require zero work, “skill”, or expense
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• The simple 4-word “rule” you must NEVER break when communicating with your man (Making just this one mistake leads to payback, withdrawal… and even WORSE behavior from him)
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• A reaction men often have when you tell them something important that makes it SEEM as though he isn’t listening to you… but actually means he’s deeply concerned (Mess this one up and he could end up resenting you… so pay attention)
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• The absolute best way to make sure a man listens to you when you have something REALLY important you need to share (When you absolutely positively must have a man’s attention, this is the technique to use)
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• The time when you must let HIM take control in order to get what YOU want
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• A simple two-word change in the way you express a concern to a man that will make him respond positively to what you are saying instead of getting angry and defensive
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• A simple 3-minute exercise to do BEFORE you talk to your man that clears your mind and relaxes you (Do this first to ensure you don’t “lose it” and say something you’ll regret later)
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• How you can give your man variety in a monogamous relationship
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• The 5 Key Ingredients every relationship must have if it’s going to last more than just a few months (Most relationships have 1 or 2 of these things… but it’s only couples who share ALL 5 that end up lasting forever…)
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• And much, much more…
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How To Tell If This Program
Is Right For YOU…

If you already have a truly secure and certain relationship where your man shares what he’s thinking and feeling… and wants you to as well… well then, consider yourself VERY lucky. On the other hand… if you find yourself constantly wondering how your man feels and what he’s thinking… and find yourself having to “guess” instead of getting the answers straight from him because the connection isn’t there… then this program is going to bring about some very exciting changes in your life… If you’re tired of the constant anxiety and emotional uncertainty that comes from doing everything you can think of to share yourself with a man both physically and emotionally… yet receiving next to nothing in return… chances are this program contains EXACTLY what you need to turn your relationship around and start experiencing the love and connection you deserve. If you’ve ever felt as though your emotions get the best of you… and allow you to say things that you know make your man withdraw or pull away… this program will show you what to do INSTEAD to remain confident and in control… and make your man RESPECT YOU more in the process. If you’re the type of caring woman who has found yourself verbally and emotionally “nurturing” a man… or trying to “save” a man that just isn’t doing anything to help himself… this program will show you how to start actually getting something back for your efforts instead of having your man take you for granted. And… if you’re the type of strong, independent woman who knows you’re often right… and that your man needs to listen and learn something while you are talking… this program will show you how to get your man to RESPECT YOUR OPINIONS and value your insights… and bring the two of you closer together in the process. Upon going through this program you’re going to feel a sense of ease and comfort when having a conversation with your man… because you’ll have a very clear picture of what your future can hold... and you’ll be able to literally create your own path to love and happiness with your partner since you can openly talk and share… Get ready… because your love life is about to get very exciting… The world of dating, relationships and love is no exception… It’s common to think that you should somehow just know everything you need to know “naturally” when it comes to men and relationships. In fact, lots of women (and men) can’t stand to admit that they don’t know everything there is to know about the opposite sex and this whole area of their lives. But it’s when things stop going “according to plan” (like when a man gets distant, scared or decides he isn’t ready for a commitment, or stops “feeling it” for a woman) that we all realize that we’re not the experts we had hoped we were… If you’re serious about finding true love, one of the single most important things you will ever do is to surround yourself with other people who ALREADY KNOW how to get there… and have seen and dealt with all the problems you’re running into. And while your female friends are great, I’m talking about people who have not only been through it themselves, and KNOW the exact steps to take in each CRITICAL situation… but people who have also spent years successfully teaching others how to have the kind of success and fulfillment in dating and relationships that they’re looking for. Because this is so important, I’ve begun tracking down as many of these experts as I can find, and getting each one to “spill their guts” for our benefit. Every month I do a live audio interview with someone whose FASCINATING INSIGHTS will make you more successful with men, dating and relationships… and especially that one special man…